Apr 25, 2012

Chip's Mock (The Best Mock)

Since James took things into his own hands on Twitter and guaransheed three new mocks, here goes my Mock v. 4.0. [I think it's my fourth mock, right?]

I haven't seen JP's mock, and James' is pretty good, but he doesn't have all 32 picks projected correctly like I will in this mock. Prepare to be enlightened. 

1) Indianapolis Colts: Andrew Luck, QB Stanford

Everyone except the down syndrome (jokes on me--it took me about 10 tries to spell that) community (jokes on me again I though community ended with "ee") has this pick locked in. 

2) Washington Redskins: Robert Griffin III, QB Baylor

As the Onion pointed out, there's a real possibility that Dan Snyder mistakenly trades this pick for a washed up veteran. 

3) Minnesota Vikings: Matt Kalil, OT USC

As much as Jim Irsay likes to think he knows about football (sorry Jim Ryan Tannehill isn't the "hidden gem" in the draft), he doesn't. This pick will be the Vikings and it will be Kalil.

4) Cleveland Browns: Morris Claiborne, CB LSU

Trent is the popular pick here, but this running back class is deep. Shut-down corners don't grow on trees, but Isaiah Peads/Lamar Millers/LaMichael James/Doug Martins etc do.

5) Tampa Bay Buccaneers: Trent Richardson, RB Alabama

Tampa hasn't had a running back this good since the one whose jersey I wore this weekend. (Eric Rhett). Just kidding, Michael Pittman was incredible.

6) St. Louis Rams: Justin Blackmon, WR Oklahoma St.

Jeff Fisher and whoever the Rams new GM is made that trade with the Skins for two reasons. 1) They knew they could rape the Redskins since they don't give a fuck about draft picks and 2) they knew that either Blackmon or Kalil will be here for the taking.

7) Jacksonville Jaguars: Stephon Gilmore, CB South Carolina

The Jags have a habit of over-drafting players (Alualu and Gabbert). Plus, a little birdie told me Jacksonville is high on Gilmore.

8) Miami Dolphins: Ryan Tannehill, QB Texas A&M

In the eyes of Todd McShay, the Fins get a franchise QB. In the eyes of everyone else who follows the NFL/college football, the Fins get Blaine Gabbert 2.0.

9) Carolina Panthers: Michael Brockers, DT LSU

Brockers is shooting up draft boards, much like another LSU lineman did a few years ago--Tyson Jackson. Also, just like Tyson Jackson, Brockers is a very talented college lineman who does nothing exceptionally well and will be very mediocre in the pros.

10) Buffalo Bills: Mark Barron, S Alabama

This is pretty high for Barron, but he's a great DB. Offensively the Bills are set at the skill positions but could use offensive line help after losing Demetress Bell to free agency. I think Riley Reiff is in play here, but he T-Rex arms will keep him from being a top-10 pick.

11) Kansas City Chiefs: Melvin Ingram, OLB Alabama

Romeo Crennel loves his pass-rushers (see Kam Wimbley over Heloti Ngata in 2006), so I have him and Scott Pioli taking Ingram over Reiff here as well.

12) Seattle Seahaws: Michael Floyd, WR

Pete Carroll goes with a wideout here to give new QB Matt Flynn some weapons to work with.

13) Arizona Cardinals: Dave DeCastro, OG Stanford

DeCastro is the best interior line prospect to come out in a long time, and Ken Whisenhunt and Russ Grimm know the value of a strong interior line from their days with Allen Faneca in Pittsburgh. Fuck Pittsburgh.

14) Dallas Cowboys: Janoris Jenkins, CB N. Alabama

Jenkins has supposedly slipped down board lately due to character concerns. But if there is one personell guy who doesn't give a fuck about that it's Jerry Jones. Plus Rob Ryan needs a DB to get burned after his failed crazy blitzes every series.

15) Philadelphia Eagles: Fletcher Cox, DL Mississippi St

We'll see if Cox makes it down this far, but if he does, look for Andy Reid to jump on him like he would a Pepperoni Lover's pizza.

16) New York Jets: Courtney Upshaw, OLB/DE Alabama

Rex Ryan can't really think that Aaron Maybin is a legitimate solution at outside linebacker, can he?

17) Cincinnati Bengals: Quentin Coples, DE UNC

Cincinnati gets a supposedly top d-line prospect after losing out on the ever-dominant Frostee Rucker to our very own Brownies.

18) San Diego Chargers: Chandler Jones, DE/OLB Syracuse

Mike Mayock said recently that Jones will turn out to be the best defensive player in this draft. If this is true, scratch this pick. Remember, AJ Smith also drafted Larry English a few years ago.

19) Chicago Bears: Stephen Hill, WR Georgia Tech

Jay Cutler gets another deep threat to throw to with his rocket arm and rampant bitch-ness.

20) Tennessee Titans: Luke Kuechly, LB Boston College

Tennessee gets Kuechly here to replace Barrett Ruud. In other news Kuechly looks to me to be another one of those prospects who was very solid in college but I just can't see performing at a top-pick level in the pros. See Curry, Aaron.

21) Cincinnati Bengals: Lamar Miller, RB Miami

No fucking way the Bengals rely solely on The Law Firm this year, right?

22) Cleveland Browns: Cordy Glenn, OL Georgia

Glenn is a beast. If the Browns think he can produce at right tackle he could very well be the pick. That being said, I would be surprised if they do actually pass on an offensive skill player with their first two picks.

23) Detroit Lions: Dre Kirkpatrick, CB Alabama

Offensive line is a need here, but historically the Lions have passed on addressing it with first round picks. Kirkpatrick is a good value here, especially after losing Eazy E to the Bucs.

24) Pittsburgh Steelers: Kevin Zeitler, OL Wisconsin

I saw this in a few mocks and Pittsburgh needs offensive line help. Plus, "Zeitler" is just a name I could see on the back of a Steelers jersey. Fuck Pittsburgh again.

25) Denver Broncos: Doug Martin, RB Boise St

Three running backs in the first round is a lot, but Martin's versatility is something Peyton Manning always had in his RBs in Indy. Also, there's no fucking way Willis McGahee runs like it's 2001 again and Moreno sucks.

26) Houston Texans: Kendall Wright, WR Baylor

The defense is set, even with losing Mario Williams to Buffalo. Wright would give Matt Schaub a good compliment to work with across from Andre Johnson.

27) New England Patriots: Harrison Smith, S Notre Dame

Defensive back? Check. White? Check. Remember folks, we're talking about Boston here.

28) Green Bay Packers: Whitney Mercilus, DE/OLB Illinois

The Pack's defense was less than impressive last year. Since they cut Nick Collins maybe Smith is in play here, but I obviously have him off the board here. Mercilus led the nation in sacks last year and could provide a good compliment to Clay Matthews Jr. up in cheese country.

29) Baltimore Ravens: Dont'a Hightower, LB Alabama

Is this the year Baltimore finally finds a replacement for Ray Lewis?

30) San Francisco 49ers: Coby Fleener, TE Stanford

Jim Harbaugh always used two-tight end sets at Stanford, and obviously has a lot of familiarity with Fleener.

31) New England Patriots: Peter Konz, C Wisconsin

The Pats pick up another typical New England player here. Dan Koppen is old as shit anyways, a replacement isn't a bad idea.

32) New York Giants: Lavonte David, OLB Nebraska

The G-Men could use some linebacker help here. The offense is set and so is the defensive line. David could provide an upgrade to the front seven if he is the pick here.



No explanation needed here, except for the fact that I would be shocked if Weeden is a first round pick. He won't go in the top half of the draft, and most other teams in the late first don't need a QB.


The Browns have hosted Wagner and let's be honest, D'Qwell Jackson hasn't exactly been Mr. Reliable the past few years.

1 comment:

  1. Anonymous8:50 AM

    Could see Vikes take Claiborne, and don't see Browns passing on Trent. And the pats said they would take McClellin if he's there with one of their first round picks. We will see